But now a days its fading from me. i never told people alot of things, but i tell them apart of it. there are times where i am suffering and i drop obvious signs, but people look away thinking im ok. Many people will always say that i am strong and everything, coming to me when they are troubled. I am very happy, really , when people come to me to talk about their problems. But it saddens me that people that i have helped never realise i am in pain. if i knew that something is bothering you, y couldn't you do the same? i may laugh it off and stuff but its cuz i don't want to trouble you, but actually i wan people to care about me. I know i have people who loves me and care for me dearly. but it saddens me that no one knew until i brought it out. i am not faulting anyone but myself, i distance myself from everyone, not letting anyone get to know wad goes in my head. even the strongest pillar have to fall.

but what really hurt me was many didnt know, and those who did, just kept quiet and left me to do it on my own. thinking im strong enough to get over it.

this what it feels like always being in the shadow, always smiling telling everyone tht ure ok but ure not, and ure the one who sees the holes in the smile. the rest don't see it. no one cn see it until i tell them... sometimes i wonder wad every one realli think of me, if they thought so highly of me, why am i always forgotten, why am i the one who have to tell ppl im a crying. why cn't anyone see it whn i cn see them cry. well maybe thats me,people wun hate me nor love me to remember me. i will just be a piece of blank paper, leaving no impressions and leaving no signs.

well since my blog has been rotting for so long i doubt people will start reading it. so i might as well type wad i really want without worrying about ppl getting angry at me or smething when i blog. if you really want to know wads in this head of mine thats twisted. go ahead. like i said~ happy eating the part of my brain.

ENJOY YOUR MEAL.