enjoy your meal.
Friday, 23 August 2013, 10:23
A world only we know.
Each of us have a world that only we know. Can you honestly say that someone else know your world completely? No one is that open, well i haven't met anyone like that anyways.
My world is scary and dark that i never want to ever be in it. The world came to plain view when i was like 16. My mother will only see fault in me, never bother thinking that i have reasons. All she think about is that she is right. My friends, just see me as a very blur and quite gong.
My mom just yelled at me for being rude to her. Yea it's my fault but i learned it from her, and when i told her that that is what she will do the whole family for no reason. She will justify herself and say that she has all the right to do it, and i do not. I do not have the right to be a person and justify myself. Because i am stupid, i am not as good as her. i am not worth being raised. but she doesn't know what i did. I've never want to be in nursing, I only did it to make her happy saying that its what i want to do. I've never wanted it. i want my stage, my theatre, my empty notebooks so i can fill them up. But i'm so scared of what my family will say if i continue. i want to run away so badly, my parents dun treat me badly. My parents treat me well, but these moments are where i feel that i dun have a life. It's when my parents degrade me. And im not strong enough to fight back, im very passive. I always let them be what they want to believe. I would not bother arguing. Why should i? What's the point? somehow it's always my fault. Things that i really want to do. run away, and be with the stage. I want to kill myself sometimes cuz thts what my mom wants, to die once.
They never knew what happen,why i left my dream. I left cuz a dark man deceived me, and took what i have that holds dear to me. I left to make a stable future, to make my mom happy. but i know there are times i slack off and just do what i want. because, i already am loosing what i want. so at least let me do what i wan now,temporarily.
others will onli show u a part of their world, never the whole thing. because some still doesn't know what their whole world look like.